Fears.

Readers, 

Today I realized, that as I was crawling on the roof to help my mom with the air conditioning, that I have a really dumb fear... Climbing onto the ladder and going up it. Usually, I just stand at the bottom of the ladder holding it for my mom, but today... She needed me to go up there with her and  help her just hold some part for the air conditioning. 

As I stood at the top of the ladder wobbling, fearfully flinging myself onto the roof, I thought to myself, "This is stupid, what am I so afraid of?". What exactly was I afraid of? The roof is sturdy, I have my mom's loving hand to guide me and protect me, yet every possible thing that could go wrong was running through my head- I could kick the ladder it would fall, there would be no way down, I could fall and land on the fence- ultimately dying,   of course, I could fall through the roof, and the list goes on. I was terrified being up there. But, we finished our work up there and carefully climbed down. 

Last night, as I was beginning to write this, I thought how fear applies to so many of our daily lives- some of us choose to overcome these fears and step out in faith, and some of us cower and sit idly by. 

But, what if we were to step out in complete faith knowing that Jesus has us completely and firmly in his grip. We are His children, and like that parent that cares about us so deeply and loves us so unconditionally , He's looking out for our best interest; and even though we sometimes do not like the outcome or the path He has set for us, we have to know that it is in our best interest for Christ to guide us. We have to listen and obey Him.  Even when the Devil tries to tempt you, lead you astray, we must, WE MUST focus on the light, we must keep our focus on Christ. He is our cornerstone, the one stone holding us together. 

My faith in Christ has not faltered over the past months, the trials and tribulations that I have been going through, are not merely just bumps and bruises to add to the insult and injury that I have been experiencing, have been some of the best possible things that could have happened. I have truly been shown Christ's love and grace. How strange is that to say? These experiences and expectations that I have been wanting, not only have failed, but Jesus is saying, not right now- if it be for love, work, or for the friend who I was trying to save. I have been so terrified of being alone and having nothing to show for my work, that God has given me some of the most gorgeous opportunities to break through walls and barriers. I have been so terrified to grow up, there are things I cannot let go of, but.. I am slowly learning how to let go of, and I am indeed growing up. 

I am growing into someone that I would have not believed I could be a year ago. If you had told me, this time last summer that I would be working with children, serving a church, not only serving but leading future generations of kids... I would have probably laughed at you and cussed at you. Probably not cussed, maybe. I really don't know anymore. Ha.

But, I have boldly stepped out in faith. I have been inviting people to church, I have been sharing the joy of Christ with others. Last week, I bought a homeless man a hamburger- he wasn't begging for anything, I just couldn't leave him sitting there. So, I bought extra food and called out to him. I do not know what has become of him in the week since, but... Through a simple act, he has been shown the love of Christ. 

If more Christians were to step out boldly in their faith, and show others what it is to be truly Christ like, the impact would be huge. 

In Jeremiah 1:4-8, we see God calling upon Jeremiah to speak to other nations about God. 

Then the word of the Lord came to me, saying:
"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you;
Before you were born I sanctified you;
I ordained you a prophet to the nations."

Then said I:
"Ah, Lord God! 

Behold, I cannot speak, for I am youth."

But the Lord said to me:

"Do not say, ' I am youth,' 
For you shall go to all whom I send you, 
And whatever I command you, you shall speak. 
Do not be afraid of their faces,
For I am with you to deliver you," say the Lord.

For me, this is so incredibly powerful. We are made in God's image. He knows us. He knows our failures, our shortcoming, our fleshly desires, but He still loves us and he still wants us to go and make disciples of nations. How cool is that?

Readers, what are your fears?  What is holding you back from doing God's work? Our Lord and Savior is willing to meet us where we are. No matter how far we've fallen, He's stretching His hand out, waiting to catch us. We just have to get back onto our paths. And He will meet us.